Bush/Blair conversation revealed

In November last year, Lord Patel published the contents of a "leaked" text of a conversation between President Bush and Prime Minister Blair here it is.

After that is the one recorded and published round the world today ... SPOT THE DIFFERENCE

Secret Bush/Blair conversation revealed ? November 2005

A slim, rather crumpled brown envelope has been thrust under my door, which regrettably Tyson my Chihuana has mauled more than somewhat…

On opening I was surprised to find the details of a conversation which appears to be between a Prime Minister and a President. There are insufficient details to precisely determine , place , date , time …

… so I tell you Prime Minister these guys are wandering about there. Clapping their f(inaudible) hands, wearing bedsheets, strutting about like they own the f (inaudible) ing place .

They got this Radio Station, like VOA I tell you…

PRIME MINISTER
VOA ?
PRESIDENT
Voie of America, you know propaganda and all that c (inaudible).. called Al Jaz .
PRIME MINISTER
Al Jazeera ? The service funded by the Qatari Monarchy that took up all the staff from the Saudi Orbit channel the BBC World Service used to run up till 1966, and then closed down ?
PRESIDENT
Yes. I guess the same time they gave Saddam one of our Boeing 747’s for a present. Well it’s spewing out all this Arab c(inaudible), Osama BL BS. Beheadings.. I tell you… now Fallujah… these guys are (inaudible) and (inaudible).
We should bomb the C(inaudible)… bo(inaudible) these (inaudible) is too b(inaudible) too good for the (inaudible).
PAGE RIPPED
… so let me get this right then Prime Minister. You say don’t bomb these b(inauduble) and the BBC will set up a NEW Arab service to severely diss these b(audible).
When can we set this up ?
PRIME MINISTER
Well let’s see it’s April now, let’s say mid October next year. WE could mmove fast on this, the BBC could be ready I guess, £30 Mn should set it up. Very popular the BBC you know President. They have really good shows. The Archers .
PRESIDENT
You mean like Rush Limbaugh ?
PRIME MINISTER
(coughs) Well….er…
PRESIDENT
So that’s it then Prime Minister we bomb them with BS eh ? C/O the FO ? Nudge Nudge wink wink. Shower the sh(inaudible) with sound eh?
Prime Minister I like your style.. Softlee softlee killee monkey eh nudge nudge wink wink.

Hey you still using that Colgate toothpaste. Need some more ?
Now where was I …let’s open another bottle. G(inayduble) it’s hot in here. Stinking Texas weather, give me Connecticut anytime…

Paper torn.

…Yes President I’ll get on to it straight away.
Yes Sir. Straight away. Yes Sir.


Secret Bush/Blair conversation revealed ? July 16th 2006

Bush: Yo Blair How are you doing?
Blair: I'm just...
Bush: You're leaving?
Blair: No, no, no not yet. On this trade thingy...[inaudible]
Bush: yeah I told that to the man
Blair: Are you planning to say that here or not?
Bush: If you want me to
Blair: Well, it's just that if the discussion arises...
Bush: I just want some movement.
Blair: Yeah
Bush: Yesterday we didn't see much movement
Blair: No, no, it may be that it's not, it maybe that it's impossible
Bush: I am prepared to say it
Blair: But it's just I think what we need to be an opposition
Bush: Who is introducing the trade
Blair: Angela
Bush: Tell her to call 'em
Blair: Yes
Bush: Tell her to put him on them on the spot.Thanks for the sweaters it's awfully thoughtful of you
Blair: It's a pleasure
Bush: I know you picked it out yourself
Blair: Oh, absoultely, in fact I knitted it myself
Bush: What about Kofi [inaudible] his attitude to ceasefire and everything else ... happens
Blair: Yeah, no I think the [inaudible] is really difficult. We can't stop this unless you get this international business agreed.
Bush: Yeah
Blair: I don't know what you guys have talked about but as I say I am perfectly happy to try and see what the lie of the land is but you need that done quickly because otherwise it will spiral
Bush: I think Condi is going to go pretty soon
Blair: But that's that's that's all that matters. But if you, you see it will take some time to get that together
Bush: Yeah, yeah
Blair: But at least it gives people...
Bush: It's a process, I agree. I told her your offer to...
Blair: Well...it's only if I mean... you know. If she's got a..., or if she needs the ground prepared as it were... Because obviously if she goes out, she's got to succeed, if it were, whereas I can go out and just talk
Bush: You see, the ... thing is what they need to do is to get Syria, to get Hezbollah to stop doing this shit and it's over
Blair: [inaudible]
Bush: [inaudible]
Blair: Syria
Bush: Why?
Blair: Because I think this is all part of the same thing
Bush: Yeah.
Blair: What does he think? He thinks if Lebanon turns out fine, if we get a solution in Israel and Palestine, Iraq goes in the right way...
Bush: Yeah, yeah, he is sweet
Blair: He is honey. And that's what the whole thing is about. It's the same with Iraq
Bush: I felt like telling Kofi to call, to get on the phone to Bashad [Bashir Assad](9a and make something happen
Blair: Yeah
Bush: [inaudible]
Blair:
Bush: We are not blaming the Lebanese government
Blair: Is this...? (at this point Blair taps the microphone in front of him and the sound is cut.)

With thanks to Adam Boulton and all the other guys at SKY - Adam is getting married soon by the way.

Sounds like Pete Cook and Dudley Moore to me, or a couple of drunk hysbands frightened to go home and face the music and the missus.

Who's giving the orders and who is taking them .....