Des Browne and Loose Bowel Syndrome

Des "I speak your weight" Browne, our erstwhile Minister of Defence reflects the Peter Principle of management theory. This is my old friend Pete who reckons any Member of Parliament is by definition, promoted beyond the level of their ability.

As a provincial Ayrshire solicitor , conveyancing your cowshed or dealing with your divorce, Des is probably modestly competent. In dealing with the great affairs of State, in coping with egregious shits of doubtful parentage like Lord Drayson, the Prima Donna's of the 3 services, whose internecine warfare is continually erupting in public , he is a babe in arms.

On top of this he has No 10's devious media circus heading for the horizon (along with prime amnesiac Tony) , the PCC and warring Press owners and their editors stirring the ordure as only they know how, aggrieved jolly jack tars and their families - and maybe even that ex military chap from the D Notice committee on his back.

Unsupported by the proximity of parliamentary colleagues he is very much on his own.

Hence no doubt, many visits to the water closet this weekend (Always presuming they now have flushing toilets in the Doon Valley).

The question, is WWDB do ?

Here at Patel Towers we see he has 2 options.

1) He makes a swift, short statement outlining very briefly the cock-up, communications SNAFU's and tenders his resignation. This settles and buries the matter for the instant and everything is left until the various committees, enquiries report - which they probably never will.

2) He treats us to a detailed forensic analysis of events starting with Invasion Day 2003 , the Queen's Regulations, phases of the moon, blusters about stolen iPOD's , human rights, and explains that while he accepts respsonsibility he is not ..er... actually ..er .. responsible.

It is evident that events in the Middle East and elsewhere the Al Quaeda aligned organisation have upped their game in recent weeks. Whatever the view of the legality, good sense, of the original Iraqi invasion it is essential that the current military effort is undertaken with a clear solid vision.

Let us face it, if the Coalition of the Dishonest does not succeed in controlling Iraq - a prospect that seems more unlikely as every day passes - if a determined assault is made on the Green Zone - the Plain of Jars will be seen as a picnic.

The next 6/8 weeks are critical - not to the success of the invasion, but the survival of the coalition land forces. This will result in greater dependence on massive aerial superiority expressed in a terminal blitzkreig.... whose intensity and extension will become uncontrollable by the forces of democracy (viz the secret bombing of Cambodia,Laos) ... which is exactly what the bunch of sex maniacs and crooks in Tel Aviv want.

So Des takes his lunch pail... who gets the job ? ..... step forward Jack Straw.