New Stockwell Killing Accident - Met respond immediately.

A 16-year-old boy was chased by youths on bicycles and died from gunshot wounds at the scene of the crime in Stockwell, South London today (BBC). The Met's Operation Trident team, which investigates gun crime in London's black community, led by Cressida Dick is investigating.

Advised about the casually dressed gun toting killers she has ;

1. Immediately asked for the Health and Safety Executive to investigate.

2. Sent a team of officers in to "secure" all CCTV footage.

3. Made certain that Sir Iain Blair or any senior officers at Scotland Yard are not advised or informed about any aspects of the murder accident for at least 24 hours.

4. As the killers people who caused the accident will have done a bunk taken a previously planned holiday to make sure they all sing from the same songsheet and practise their handwriting and are nowhere near anybody from the IPCC to recover from the sudden trauma of the accident, therefore any enquiries will proceed at a very leisurely pace but will involve a great deal of overtime.

5. Intense investigations will be undertaken about the victimperson injured in the accident involving multiple gunshot wounds to see if they have previously been involved in rape, indecent assault, and that their computers are not stuffed with vile paedophile images or if they are illegal immigrants.

6. Any witnesses to the murder accident will be asked to provide proof of identity, a DNA Sample, fingerprints, iris scans, and sign a witness statement and an eternal vow of secrecy punishable by death.