Kinnochio's long term mistress, hand jobber and unelectable ginger minger is handed House of Lords scandal to sift through

Flame haired temptress, ginger minger Janet "Jan" Anne Royall, Baroness Royall of Blaisdon, Privy Counsellor 53, has NEVER been elected to any office and is now in the spotlight as Leader of the House of Lords because her (and Lord Patel's ) colleagues have been lining their pockets to produce user friendly legislation for fee paying industry and commerce

In the 80's this gentle soul was very, very, very, very close to Lord Kinnochio of Bedwetting - another pale faced , (but hideously Weslh) ginger minger and whinger and she would often be found riffling through his drawers (and vice versa) Billed as a "special advisor" she found a perch for her pretty but ever so pale bottom as head of the EU's office in Wales.

Created a Baroness 4 and half years ago after having her beavering rewarded as Lord Kinnochios "chef de cabinet" in Brusels she was also made a Government whip, as well as being Government Spokesperson for Health, for International Development and for the Foreign and Commonwealth Office.

When Lord Patel's old chum, acne ridden Bruce Grocott (PPS for many years to Tony Blair) resigned almost exactly a year ago as HOL Chief Whip, she took over and was made Privy Councillor. As recently as 3rd October 2008, Baroness Royall was promoted to the cabinet and made Leader of the House of Lords and Lord President of the Council by Prime Minister Gordon Brown.

She was handed this post (succeeding Baron Amos (more on her scandals , exotic body piercings, foreign travel and unexpected bumps in the night here Wednesday, April 27, 2005 Lady Amos Fast risen Blair "babe" at Straw's FO and here Wednesday, May 23, 2007 Chagos Islanders give the fucking lying bitch at the The Foreign Office a Bloody Nose) - because selection is based entirely on the size of the areola - largest wins - although Baroness Amos, a very very close friend of Ex Prime Minister and Zionist tub thumper Tony Blair, was said to have cheated as she included the size of her excessively long nipples "like chapel hat pegs "John Prescott was heard to remark on one occasion from the depths of his office shag pile carpet).

Not famed originally for her nipple quotient their later enlargement is due entirely to their use to stop (and very effectively) Lord Kinnochio whinging on and on in the privacy of his EU eyrie.

Mysteriously her recent job evaluation included first Forester in the Government , whatever that may be.

Her involvement with the greedy and venal, Lords Truscott, Taylor, et al means she is also now the Government's Shit shifter in residence and police's the comical Code of Conduct. The full and official register of declaration of interest of members of HOL (and their staffs) can be consulted here up to and including 27th Jan 2009. See example below

PS : Lord Patel's political truffle hounds have been handed an unsavoury pile of information about other members of the HOL who have extensively lined their pockets ... Watch this unsavoury space. Lord Mogg of the East Pier Brighton and comedian in residence at OfGEM is of course blameless but hugely incompetent and prize wanker to boot.

Baroness Symons of Vernham Dean is of course another blameless and charming Lady with a lengthy and fascinating list of interests ....see here.

An example of declaration of interest would be (simply as an example)

WADE OF CHORLTON, Lord (ennobled 1990)AKA Sir William Oulton Wade of Chester.
*12(d) Non-parliamentary consultant
Davies Wallis Foyster King Sturge President, Combined Heat and Power Association ,Access Partnership
*12(e) Remunerated directorships
William Wild & Son Ltd, Choulton Services Ltd, NIMTECH Murray Vernon (Holdings) Ltd, RisingStars Growth Fund Ltd, Country Pubs Ltd, Midas Capital Partners Ltd
*12(g) Controlling shareholdings
Choulton Services Ltd (consultancy and investment) William Wild & Son Ltd (farming and property)
*13(a) Significant shareholdings
Midas Capital Partners Ltd

He is a busy member asking 13 questions (They work for you) last year which is above average including (1 Jul 2008) - Lord Wade of Chorlton: asked Her Majesty's Government: What areas have been identified as suitable for the establishment of eco-towns.