A US Diplomatic lesson - Soft Cop / Tough Cop

Prior to his invasion of Kuwait, Saddam Hussein peremptorily summoned the US Ambassador to Iraq, April Glaspie to a meeting with , this was the first time she had met him, which was at noon when the US was asleep.

What exactly was said during that meeting has been the subject of much speculation and propaganda for many years.

Various versions of what happened have been produced but the most commonly believed is one that states

..."We have no opinion on your Arab-Arab conflicts, such as your dispute with Kuwait. Secretary Baker has directed me to emphasize the instruction, first iven to Iraq in the 1960s, that the Kuwait issue is not associated with America."

Although this text does not appear in the document that is in the Thatcher Foundation which is is said to be the official sate telegram covering the meeting which is accessible at the margaret Thatcher Foundation Archives.(Gulf War: US Embassy Baghdad to Washington Saddam's message of friendship to George Bush) [declassified 1998] (see pic above)

James Akins, the U.S. Ambassador to Saudi Arabia (he had been Attache, in Baghdad,(1963-65) at the time, was interviewed on PBS radio in 2000 and offered a slightly different (and odd) perspective.offered a somewhat different perspective in a 2000 interview on the US Public Broadcasting Service.

"I have talked to a lot of my colleagues and said, "What would you have said if you were with Saddam and the subject of Kuwait came up? You would say exactly what April said, wouldn't you?" I know I would have. He talked about the border dispute with Kuwait, and she took the straight American line, which is we do not take positions on border disputes between friendly countries. That's standard. That's what you always say. You would not have said, "Mr. President, if you really are considering invading Kuwait, by God, we'll bring down the wrath of God on your palaces, and on your country, and you'll all be destroyed." She wouldn't say that, nor would I. Neither would any diplomat."

Which is remarkably different from what Richard Holbrooke said on PBS when he went to see Slobodan Milosevic when he had refused to sign the Rambouillet alleged Treaty.

You're sent again to talk to Milosevic, after the Albanians finally agree, at least in part. What happened in that March meeting, just before the bombing begins?

" .....I went back alone, and I sat there alone with Milosevic. I said to him, "You understand that if I leave here without an agreement today, bombing will start almost immediately." And he said, "Yes, I understand that." I said, "You understand it'll be swift, severe and sustained." And I used those three words very carefully, after consultations with the Pentagon. And he said, "You're a great country, a powerful country. You can do anything you want. We can't stop you." There was an air of resignation to him, and we sat alone in this big, empty palace, surrounded by these inherited Rembrandts and other art left over from earlier regimes. I said, "Yes, you understand. You're absolutely clear what will happen when we leave?" And he said, very quietly, "Yes. You'll bomb us." . . . I told him that the White House and the state department are waiting for a report, and that I've got to go. I asked, "Is that it? And one more time, you understand what happens?" He said, "Yes." So we left, and that was it. I want to stress that there was no misunderstanding in his mind. He knew the bombing would start immediately after our departure, and it did, less than 30 hours later.

They must have gone to different schools of diplomacy.

Cash for Coronets - The Truth, the Whole Truth and anything but the fucking Truth

So, soon to be Lord Alan Rusbridger of Forked Tong and the Guradian ("Comment is free but the facts are very confusing") have exposed that a document .. a document in the broadest sense, you will understand m'lud that may exist, may be an e-mail, or a piece of paper, or maybe not, it may be an electronic note, or it may have or have not been sense in that sense m'lud.

That document (?) or electronic phantasm, may or may not be written by Truth Turner, (sister of Tina ?) to Jaunty "Bubbles" Pole the handy plumber plumbing leaks (or creating them ?) well, it may involve scandalum magnatum m'lud regarding the Karaoke King, the Tottering Toff of Totteridge, My Lord Levy and then again may not, as it were involve strange handshakes of men on the square ...you may catch my drift m'lud.

Anyone might imagine that we had a mediaeval conclave of Bishops earnestly discussing the correct number of sylphs that could be comfortably seated upon the head of a pin - or indeed that someone was orchestrating a rather well planned and well executed campaign of throwing seaside silicon in the collective face of the public. Leaving footprints of the elegantly shod Peter Mandlebum of Matelot's Row and the heavily booted and suited, gritty Northern Alastair Soup, to be obscured by the scouring winds of the assembled Press... who could not possibly betray their sources (article 10 of the European convention on human rights) ....except in the case of the Guradian they might if a junior clerical assistant like Sarah Tisdall is involved...which brings one back to Truth Turner..... anxiously discussing the size of her payoff to resign .. who knows, to take up the marketing post left free by the departure of Gila Sacks at a top Jewish Charity UJIA for the homeless, despised and reviled.

Meanwhile in the square of the Red Lion the lawyers count the shekels.

When the music stops, everyone sit down again, except you my Lord Silversmith you won't find a chair. Lord Fat Jowells of Fettes sobs and sighs, makes his arse twice the size (Trad.)

Lessons in the Law No 17

Journalists are given statutory protection against identifying sources under section 10 of the Contempt of Court Act of 1981. The Act says that a court cannot require someone to disclose a source of information, nor will they be held guilty of contempt of court for refusing to disclose it, unless "the court is satisfied disclosure is necessary in the interests of justice or national security or for the prevention of disorder or crime".

That doesn't prevent them of course at someone's request, suggestion , a nod is as good as a wink to a man with glasses quite as thick as Nick Robinson's, NO what I mean guv, wink, wink, ... should make News at Ten if we hurry up ....... either making up a pack of lies or printing a pack of lies.Even.

Church of England approves theft of valuable Papal gift by Scots Nats

Phil Woolas Minister of State (Local Government & Community Cohesion), and self important MP for Oldham was defending the remarks made today by Ruth Kelly about rubbing along with Muslims, and he said we cannot accept a situation where people accept that religious law replaces civil law.

The Church of England does however have courts and apply ecclesiastical law, these are the Diocesan Consistory Courts of the Church of England - whose ultimate appeal is to the Judicial Committee of the Privy Council ?

Whilst their arcane proceedings, often achieving front page status in the red tops due to the frolics and unbridled lust of the servants of the Lord, they can and do involve themselves in fascinating crimes.

One such crime involves the handsome and notable medieval brass eagle lectern dating from the 1490s from which has been removed / stolen several times from St Stephen's Church, St Albans.... see picture.

The 150 Kg ( 3 cwt) brass 1.6 metres ( 8 feet) high lectern or reading desk bears the inscription Georgius Creichton Episcopus Dunkeldensis - George Creichton Bishop of Dunkeld. George Creichton was abbot at Holyrood abbey from 1515 to 1522 and it is likely he presented the lectern to the Abbey on being made Bishop of Dunkeld. It apparently originated in Italy in 1498 and was gifted to Scotland by Pope Alexander VI.


It is said that this was seized on the orders of Henry VIII in the 15 th Century from Holyrood by a Richard Lee who was granted land and buildings in St Albans including St Stephen's Church. It is assumed that the lectern was placed in St Stephens at this time. A lectern described as: 'É an eagle of brass to lay the booke of martyres on.' appeared in a church inventory of 1597. A similar lectern is described in an inventory of 1638.

St Albans became a Parliamentary stronghold during the Civil War and the lectern disappeared after Parliament passed laws authorising the destruction of religious objects. By 1748 the lectern had somehow been returned for use, it had apparently been recovered from the Montagu family tomb in the chancel of St. Stephen's church

Scots with long memories have however been calling for a return of the lectern since 1879 - The Lord Provost of Edinburgh asked for it back and was refused by the Vicar of St. Stephen's who expressed .." utmost repugnance to parting with the Crichton lectern".

In 1972 an attempt to steal it, left the lectern lying in pieces in the church and the loss of three lions from the base - which were subsequently found and are still today, in St Stephens possession.

It did travel to Scotland briefly for an exhibition in 1982 for an exhibition "Angels, Nobles and Unicorns"- an exhibition of mediaeval Scottish art at the National Museum of Antiquities of Scotland in Edinburgh which caused a lot of interest and widespread demand , that like the Elgin Marbles it be returned to the land of it's birth. (Although oroginally Italian - but don't expect consistency of thought / ideals / morals in this story)

Some body(ies) perhaps inflamed be these calls in 1984 attempted another theft and the greater part of it was (successfully ?) stolen from St Stephen's.

Lengthy and distant negotiations were held between the new holders of the lectern (said to be not unrelated to Siol nan Gaidheal, a Scottish nationalist organisation), the Church of Scotland and the Royal Scottish Museum . St Margaret's Church, Barnhill, Dundee generously offered St Stephen's church a Victorian reproduction eagle lectern to replace the one removed in 1984.

It was however stated to be the intention that the lectern would only see the light of day when a Scottish Parliament again sat in Edinburgh.

This gesture of a replacement lectern however lubricated the negotiations and in 1999 a courier anonymously delivered the (incomplete - sans Lion feet still in St Albans) lectern to Netherbow Arts Centre on Edinburgh's Royal Mile and since then negotiations have been on going to arrange a long-term loan to the National Museums of Scotland.

A consistory court was held in 2004 to attempt to finalise this long term greivance with a long-term loan - which they agreed to, effectively absolving the thieves - who under Common law were bang to rights. Speaking after the court sat, the Keeper of the National Museums of Scotland, Dr David Caldwell said, "I am very appreciative of the generosity of the Vicar and community of St Stephen's Church, St Albans and the Diocese of St Albans. This loan provides a great opportunity for the lectern to be displayed as an important piece of Scottish medieval history here in Edinburgh. However, the significant role of St Albans in the story of the lectern will not be forgotten."

The Vicar of St Stephens, The Revd David Ridgway now using a splendid replica lectern given by St Margaret's Church Dundee, said, "The lectern has had a long and turbulent history and so I am pleased that its future is now more settled. I am sure that it will make an excellent display with other church treasures in Edinburgh. "

Legally, the Church claims, it still belongs to the Church of England in St Stephen's Parish where the lions feet still reside.

However remember .."It apparently originated in Italy in 1498 and was gifted to Scotland by Pope Alexander VI." .... expect a visit from Pope Benedict any day.

Deoch-slàinte!